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COPMRIGIIT DEPOSITS 



ALTAR FIRES 



ALTAR FI RES 



BY 



RUTH BASSETT EDDY 




THE CORNHILL COMPANY 

BOSTON 



.^"'^ 






Copyright, 1919, by 
The Cornhill Company 



©CI,A53 5D08 

NOV 23 I9i9 



^ 



IN LOVING THOUGHT OF 
MY MOTHER 



CONTENTS 

Page 

For Love of You i 

Last Hours 3 

Companionship 4 

My Honey 5 

Unrest 7 

I Love You So 8 

Au Desespoir 9 

Love's Spring 10 

Tell Me To-Night 11 

Love's Appraisement ........ 12 

Separation 13 

Give Me a Kiss, Beloved 14 

To A Friend 15 

The Past 16 

Why Is It So? 17 

Fm Tired, That's All 18 

Ora E Sempre 19 

Love's Moments 20 

[vii] 



CONTENTS 

Page 

Our Hour 22 

Presentiment 23 

My Father 25 

And Yet 26 

Unconfessed 27 

Appreciation 28 

His Mother 29 

I Told You So 30 

Unreconciled 32 

My Rose 33 

The Traitor . . .34 

Phantoms . 36 

The Cross 37 

My Birthday 38 

Our Boys 39 

Her Passport 40 

He Kissed Her Hands 41 

Long Beach 43 

Without You 44 

Adrift 45 

So Dear He Is . 47 

[viii] 



CONTENTS 

Page 

The Debutante 48 

Night 49 

The Optimist 50 

The Home- Land 51 

The Lost Note 52 

Unblessed 54 

Broken Friendship 55 

I Need Thee 57 

Our Game ........... 58 

When I Was a Child 60 

A Prayer 61 

Virginia ........... 63 

The Summer Girl 64 

Look Down Into My Eyes 66 

Night Whispers . 67 

Earth-Bound 68 

I Shall Not Pass This Way Again .... 69 

The Young Wife ......... 70 

Contrariness 72 

Two Loves 73 

To 74 

[ix] 



CONTENTS 

Page 

Forsake Him Not 75 

Thru the Rain 76 

My Heart Is a Like a Harp "jy 

Give Me the West 78 

The Call of You 79 

Give Me the Glass 80 

Forget You, Dear? 81 

Her Reward 82 

Doubts 84 

The Price 85 

The Test of Sacrifice 86 

Surrender 87 

Uneasy Hours 88 

Farewell 89 

Their Faith In Me 90 

To 91 

You Gave Me Violets 92 

My Mother 96 



[x] 



ALTAR FIRES 



FOR LOVE OF YOU 

For love of you, sweetheart, the sky smiles down 

Upon a world so wonderful and fair ; 
Its heart is warm beneath its winter gown — 

Warm as the sun that through the crystal air 
Tossing its rays like some exultant king, 

Laughs in its joy from out God's dazzling blue, 
Kissing my eyes lest they be sorrowing 

For love of you, sweetheart, for love of you. 

For love of you, sweetheart, the stars at night 

Shake out their gleams above like golden maize. 
The tender message of the still moonlight 

Is fraught with stirring thoughts of other days. 
The world seems waiting — waiting for your voice 

To send a thrill of life its great soul through; 
All nature tunes itself unto my choice 

For love of you, sweetheart, for love of you. 

For love of you, sweetheart, life's darkest side 
Has still a ray of hope to light the way ; 

The birds their secrets to the breeze confide 
That spring but slumbers and awaits their lay 

[I] 



ALTAR FIRES 

To free the restless earth by ice entombed, 

And with the vital kiss of early dew 
To rouse it, like a glorious maid, full-bloomed, — 

For love of you, sweetheart, for love of you. 

For love of you, sweetheart, pain sheathes its sting 

Within the velvet of your faith in me : 
Above to-day's sharp thorns the roses cling — 

To-morrow's blooms, from every fetter free. 
The hours of grim discouragement I bear, 

For God must give me strength to live them through 
And I am brave enough to call life fair — 

For love of you, sweetheart, for love of you. 



[2] 



ALTAR FIRES 



LAST HOURS 

Stay near to me, my own, I fear the gloom 
And dread the long, deep shadows of the night ; 

I fear the coming of the pallid dawn, 
Its miseries and heartaches yet unborn. 

I want you near me in the darkened room, 
And with your lips upon my lips close pressed 

To say good night — and lay me down to rest. 

Stay near to me, O love, I need you so 
To help me keep unbroken that poor trust 

That feels sore shaken at the battle's cry ! 
I am too weary now to still defy 

The bitter promptings of the heart's dire woe. 
God gave me trust in Him — I've kept it bright 

All thro' life's struggle — but I fear to-night. 

Stay near, O dearest of my heart, stay near! 

Take these two helpless hands within your own 
And let my tired head lie on your breast; 

Your arms' dear haven quiets my unrest. 
So, in this hour, my trust in God I keep 

And say good-bye — and lay me down to sleep. 



[3] 



ALTAR FIRES 



COMPANIONSHIP 

If thou wouldst leave the world that men call fair, 

And delve into its sadder mystery, 
Go not alone — uncertainty is there, 
But take thou me. 

If thou forget thyself and long to go 

Away from Fortune's smile, which shines on thee- 
Thro' every grief that 'tis thy fate to know, 
Oh, take thou me ! 

And in the sacrifice, if thou shouldst gain 
A deeper knowledge of the things to be. 
The saddest lesson in the keenest pain. 
Oh, teach to me. 

And if thy mission blessings for thee reap, 
I ask no share of gifts held dear by thee, 
If, through the years, e'er sacred thou wilt keep 
Thy love for me. 



[4] 



ALTAR FIRES 



MY HONEY 

The heart of me is wanting you, is wanting you, my 
honey, 
The soul of me looks to the God you cry to in your 
prayers 
To care for you through lonely hours and keep your 
dear heart sunny, 
And free from sins that linger near to catch you in 
their snares. 

The heart of me is starving for the ripple of your 
laughter, 
The light within your happy eyes that makes day's 
great orb dim. 
Your wooing voice that prattles on about God's glad 
hereafter. 
As if we all were pure as you and blessed alike by 
Him. 

The heart of me is yearning for the pressure of your 
fingers, 
Like tender doves warm nestling there within this 
palm of mine; 
And when you draw your hand away the magic thrill 
still lingers, 
And trembles through my warm, young blood and 
stirs as it were wine. 

[5] 



ALTAR FIRES 

Oh, honey, must these longing arms but empty air be 
clasping? 
Or is your dear head weary for a pillow on my 
breast ? 
I'd hold the precious burden while a question I'd be 
asking. 
And seeking for in eyes that feared their own love to 
attest. 

I know your rosy mouth will have to give me brimming 
measure 
Of kisses when I bend my head, your shy consent to 
prove. 
The heart of me is wanting you, to cherish and to 
treasure — 
The soul of me is drooping for the sunshine of your 
love ! 



[6] 



ALTAR FIRES 



UNREST 

Where the winds blow soft with a perfume rare, 
And the wild flowers droop in their rapt delight, 

Where the hazy stars with a lazy stare 

Shine down on the vastness of the night — 

Out with the voice of God's minstrelsy, 
Tis there I'd be— 'tis there I'd be ! 

Out of the mad, exultant game 

With a heart at stake and a love run wild, 
With passionate eyes and mouth aflame. 

Into a land that is undefiled; 
By love unstirred — like a placid sea, 

'Tis there I'd be— 'tis there I'd be ! 

Light as a bird in the fragrant blue 

Sailing at peace with fleet wings outspread, 

Joyously trilling the whole day through. 
Pointing its course where sweet fancy led. 

Where the world is my own and is God's and is 
free, — 
'T is there I'd be— 't is there I'd be ! 



[7] 



ALTAR FIRES 



I LOVE YOU SO 

I only want to love you, life at best 

Is fraught with pain and longing and unrest; 

But in its love for you my spirit lifts 
Into joy's rarest ether all life's gifts. 

You lead the way and I will gladly go 
And e'er be quite content — I love you so. 

When you are near, the world bursts from its gloom, 
And flowers are glad to live and glad to bloom. 

As placid sea reflects the star-gemmed sky 
Above its mirror-surface, so do I 

Reflect within my heart each joy, each woe 
That comes into your life — I love you so. 

I live to love while you, but love to live — . 

You well may take for I — I want to give. 
The golden sun shines bright on every flower 

And gives each tree and shrub its golden dower ; 
Be like the sun — and none will ever know 

One little flower you shine on loves you so ! 



[8] 



ALTAR FIRES 



AU DESESPOIR 



There's a place in my heart that I've tried all day 

To patch and mend with the tools at hand — 
Pleasure and music have had their way 

But the wound is there. Do you understand 
Just the need I have to look in your eyes 

And feel your lips on my lips to-night? 
When the warmth of your hand on my own hand lies 

In my soul there is peace, in my heart there is light. 

I need your love in my life to stay, 

And your word's low tone in my longing ear. 
There's a place in my heart I must mend to-day, 

For the wound is there and the night is near. 
Do you feel me close with my empty hands? 

Can your eyes in mine see the mist of pain? 
'Tis the sound of your voice that my heart demands, 

And the crush of your arms and your lips again ! 



[9] 



ALTAR FIRES 



LOVE'S SPRING 

The lilt of spring is in the air, 

The ice-bound brook runs free, 
The sky, as maiden eyes, is fair, 

The birds sing happily. 
The sun its warmth and glory showers 

Alike on thee and me: 
The winds call to the sleeping flowers — 

My heart is calling thee. 

The joy of life is brief as spring, 

The sorrow dread and long; 
Oh, why should my heart be hungering 

For thee with the robin's song? 
We have our youth, we have our love. 

And the world is wide and free — 
I give my soul to Him above. 

But I give my heart to thee ! 



[10] 



ALTAR FIRES 



TELL ME TO-NIGHT 

Tell me to-night whate'er your heart would say, 

While love is bright. 
Wait not the dawn of yet another day ! 
Pleasure and wealth and gain — why, what are they? 
Only a passing gleam — and then away 

Into the night. 
Tell me to-night if aught your heart would say ; 

For I must know. 
Hope, like the sun, shines on us but a day. 
Then follows night — forever and for aye. 
Dearest of all, so lonely is the way. 

Wanting you so ! 



[II] 



ALTAR FIRES 



LOVE'S APPRAISEMENT 

What matters it, dear one, that shadows lie 
Behind the Ught that sanctifies our day? 

We cannot always find the smoother way, 
Or always smile, no matter how we try. 

The storms and passions in the world's great heart 
But tend to glorify the after part. 

So let us live within this blessed hour 

Since youth is sweet ; for with old age the chance 
To love and laugh, care-free, is gone ; the power 

No longer ours to weave youth's bright romance. 
So now, dear heart, naught in the world is true 

Except the golden sunlight, God and YOU ! 



[12] 



ALTAR FIRES 



SEPARATION 

Tell me to-night all that your heart would say, 

I want to know. 
Wait not the dawn of yet another day, 
Shadows of doubt behind the moonbeams play — 
Gladden my life by loving while you may 

Now, e'er you go ! 

Empty my hands — your own are warm and strong, 

Make mine secure. 
Kiss me to-night, the morrow may be long, 
Let your dear thoughts into my being throng ; 
Make the amen that follows love's sweet song 

Sacred and pure. 

What if the morrow never dawn for me? 

We may not know. 
Then must to-night be all a life should be — 
Kisses enough for all eternity, 
Love deep as ocean binding you and me 
Ere one must go ! 

Lift up your face where shines the moon above, 

Radiant its light ! 
So must your heart enfold me in its love, 
So must its light ne'er from my being move, 
Making our parting in this hour to prove 

Only good-night. 

[13] 



ALTAR FIRES 



GIVE ME A KISS BELOVED 

Give me a kiss, beloved, 

A kiss just for friendship's sake; 
For the story must be ended. 

The old-time link must break. 
To me the friend is dearer 

Than all the world below — 
Give me a kiss, beloved, 

Before I let you go. 

Give me a kiss, beloved, 

For my heart is sad to-night; 
I need your faith to keep me. 

Your hand to lead me right. 
I love you. Oh, I love you ! 

But you will never know ; 
Give me a kiss, beloved, 

Before I let you go. 



[14] 



ALTAR FIRES 



TO A FRIEND 



So you've nothing to say to me, have you? 
You have said all there is to say! 

And your thoughts are abstracted and weary- 
It is I who must smile and be gay. 

And I've counted the hours till I saw you — 
Have wished every minute away; 

But you've nothing to say to me, have you? 
You have said all there is to say ! 

There is much that my lips long to tell you, 

But your eyes take the impulse away; 
Have you nothing but old commonplaces 

To brighten the hour-burdened day? 
And what would you think if I told you 

The thoughts that within me sway ? 
But you've nothing to say to me, have you? 

HAVE you said all there is to say ? 

I have been so content in your friendship, 

So warmed by the touch of your hand ; 
And now in this hour of our parting 

I grieve that you don't understand ; 
For friendship 'twixt man and a woman 

Exacts many tears for its pay — 
So you've nothing to say to me, have you ? 

You have said all there is to say ! 

[15] 



ALTAR FIRES 



THE PAST 



They tell me not to grieve, but to rejoice 

In the blazing sunlight of to-day; 

Nor e'er look back to trace the shadowed way 

Dim thro' the years, dream-haunted by your voice. 

And I must mourn your dead — forgotten quite ; 
Cremated in the heat of passion's fire; 
And every throb of yearning or desire 
Must die like day before the pall of night. 

But you, in all your strong and wayward power. 
Taught me to love you and the world despise. 
Now in this hour I feel my heart arise 
And make your teachings balance for your dower. 

So 't is good-by, for nothing now remains 
Of all our joy but lees of keen regret; 
The warm, red sun of yesterday has set, 
To-day is here — and I must meet its claims. 



[i6] 



ALTAR FIRES 



WHY IS IT SO? 



Why is it so? I wonder if you know, 

You, with a man's strange soul that shuts within 
The strangest blending of romance and woe — 

That leans toward pleasure but falls into sin. 
You overstep the line with cool contempt 

Of virtue's dictates — or a woman's heart. 
From all that must be reaped are you exempt? 

Or does the joy of sowing ease the smart? 

What if I cared? What if a foolish pain 

Cut deep into my pride because you fell 
Where you should stand, or lost where you should 
gain? 

A woman's love tastes of both heaven and hell ! 
While I can crush the bitter clutch of grief 

With youth's gay mask to hide pain in my eyes. 
You may go free to seek a man's relief 

From loving bondage that a woman ties. 

But when the time shall come without our youth. 

And face to face we question of our love. 
Then you will feel the shiver of the truth 

And know the test my heart was made to prove. 
Yes, you will need me then, when you are old. 

There'll be no fret of loving bondage then : — 
Why wait until time tarnishes the gold 

Of youth's pure confidence in God and men? 

[17] 



ALTAR FIRES 



TM TIRED, THAT'S ALL 

Don't ask me to smile, my darling, 

I'm weary, so weary to-night; 
So tell me some pleasant story, 

And my spirits will soon be bright. 
But why is the room so darkened? 

And why do your tear-drops fall? 
I want to see everyone happy — 

I'm tired, that's all. 

Your hands cling to mine, oh, so fondly. 

Their warmth gives me courage and life; 
Your eyes look so pained and so troubled 

I wonder if danger is rife. 
Say it over again that you love me. 

So sweet and sincere your words fall — 
And life is so dear to me, sweetheart ! 

I'm tired, that's all. 

So tired am I now and so sleepy; 

I wonder if heaven is like this — 
'T were surely no fairer, my darling. 

Bereft of your voice and your kiss ! 
And would you forever forget me. 

Were I now to answer God's call? 
O, stay with me, sweetheart, nor sorrow, 

I'm tired, that's all ! 

[i8] 



ALTAR FIRES 



OR A E SEMPRE 



May the hands he has kissed never fold but to bless 
him, 

And may fervent the prayer for his happiness be ; 
May the lips he has kissed e'er be glad to caress him 

Whate'er holds the future for him or for me. 

For trials must come e'en in wealth's rare possession, 
And illness o'ershadow the happiest way; 

But the eyes he has kissed in love's holy confession 
Will smile in Ufe's night-time as well as life's day. 

May the love in my heart like a rose-bud in June time 
Unfold to the sun of the mellowing years. 

As lovely at eve as it was at love's noon-time, 
Perfected by pain and the dew of our tears. 

For suffering chastens the passion of loving 
As fire tempers steel in the heart of its blaze. 

The lilt of that love by my life I am proving, 
With Faith at the helm o'er the perilous ways. 

Our eyes will not always be bright with youth's spring- 
time, 

For winter must follow the beauty of spring; 
But the hands he has kissed in love's glorious ringtime, 

Will point him to God, Who made sacred the ring. 

[19] 



ALTAR FIRES 



LOVE'S MOMENTS 

We've only a little while to stay 

And the bright spots are so few; 
Let us snatch their sunshine while we may, 

An hour of life — and then away 
Forever and aye from you. 

Forever and aye from love, sweetheart, 
From hope and from joy Til be — 

For the claims of life hold us apart. 

And the only bright spot is your heart 
And the love you offer me. 

The nectar of life in the golden glass 

Shows not the dregs below : 
Shall we take it and drink it or let it pass ? 

If we drink we must drink to the lees: alas! 
'T is better to let it go. 

rd have no bitter regrets to mar 
The memory of hours with you — 

For though you are near me or though you are far, 

I will love you and trust you wherever you are, 
So we'll break the glass in two. 

The red wine flows from the shattered gold 

Like the blood of my love so rare ; 
Between us it streams like a barrier cold. 

Our happiness ever to cling to and hold, 

[20] 



ALTAR FIRES 

And our hands are left empty and bare. 
For the last faint ray of our hope is dead, 

But my hands in yours find home — 
Ah, dear one, give me your lips instead. 
Let them tell of the love that can ne'er be said 

In the dreary years to come. 



[21] 



ALTAR FIRES 



OUR HOUR 

Kiss me once ! I would remember 
YOU, in all this hallowed hour, 

When our country's voice is calling. 

And the women's tears are falling. 
Let your dear lips, warm and tender, 

To my own lips give the power 

And the strength to smile. Remember 

Hearts are breaking in this hour. 

Kiss me once ! The years hereafter 
May be full of joy and laughter, 

But this hour of death's close breathing 
Must forever leave its chill. 

Look into my eyes and see there 

All the love I know to be there ; 
Let me smile as you are leaving 

That you may think of me so — 

There's the bugle . . . Hear it calling? 
See, the women's tears are falling — 
Kiss me ! Kiss me once — and GO. 



[22] 



ALTAR FIRES 



PRESENTIMENT 



The beauty of the Orient country holds 

No charm to me, my own, beside your face; 

The depth of passion in your dear gray eyes 
Tortures reserve until, worn out, it dies 

And leaves me free love's offering to place 
Upon the altar which your heart enfolds. 

To-day the first faint chill of sombre clouds 

Must augur of a future desolate: 
I know no joy that round you does not cling, 

And with you near my every care takes wing. 
I love you, is it just that we should wait? 

I love you, should we wrap our souls in shrouds ? 

If loving you is crime, then may I know 

No virtue in this world. So dear you've grown 

The skies become effulgent in your joy. 

The day is drear when ills your life annoy ; 

If we could look ahead when years have flown, 
Would we regret the seeds of love we sow? 

Would you and I regret the past and prove 

That our blind love had darkened present days ? 

What tho' the years shall shut the sun away? 
They cannot take the light of yesterday : 

And in our very sorrow I give praise 

To that kind fate that taught us how to love. 

[23] 



ALTAR FIRES 

And so, dear love, while yet the twilight stays. 
Take me within the shelter of your arms. 

Again to lay my head on your dear breast, 
Within this hour of parting there to rest: 

And kiss me, dear, to still the dread alarms 
That hang like clouds o'er all our future days ! 



[24] 



ALTAR FIRES 



MY FATHER 



He was so ever gracious to mankind — 
The little child, the beggar at his door, 

And e'en the miser, pouring o'er his gold. 
Received alike his faith from day to day. 

And now that he is gone, I even find 

My harsher judgment checked to ponder o'er 

The greater wisdom that his trust foretold; 
For all men mourned him when he passed away. 



[25] 



ALTAR FIRES 



AND YET 



The time has come when we must say good-bye ; 

Our dream of love is o'er, and you and I 
Think now it will be easy to forget ; 

We can dismiss the past, I know, and yet — 

Long since I've felt the parting of the ways; 

Your smiling lips dissembling in their praise 
Of little things we loved. I've no regret — 

I am not sad, — I do not care, and yet — 

Please look not at me with pain's chilling mask 
Upon your face. I shall not call to task 

The passion long since stilled, nor beg, nor fret; 
My heart is dead to love, to you, and yet — 

The grass is wet beneath my feet, the dew 

Is faUing fast. I turn my eyes on you 
And tho* the burning tears my lashes wet 

I am not sad,— 't is weakness, perhaps, and yet — 

We meet to-night as strangers, you and I 

Who once knew love in all its potency. 
But go your way, I soon can you forget — 

Love lies quite dead, 't is well for us to part, and 
yet — 



[26] 



ALTAR FIRES 



UNCONFESSED 

I have listened to all nature's voices of song, 

The soft, laughing brook and the full-throated bird; 

I've listened and waited the weary day long. 
But in all of the musical raptures I've heard 

Not one strain has power or has passion to move you 
Like the simple confession — I love you, I love you. 

O, you who are over the great ocean wild, 

Are your gray eyes still brooding o'er memories of 
old? 
When our cold hands clasped tensely — our traitor lips 
smiled, 
And we parted, both leaving our story untold? 
By the dear land you tread, by the blest stars above 
you, 
I would you could know how I love you — I love 
you! 



[27] 



ALTAR FIRES 



APPRECIATION 

Truth's light is in your eyes, 

Steadfast and clear, 
Full of love's mysteries. 

Making them dear. 
And in your grave respect 

No thought is derelict ; 
Judgment so slow and wise 

Must be sincere. 

Harsh tho* you sometimes are 

In candor's cause, 
Never, lest trust you mar. 

Rings false applause. 
So, when your dear lips press 

Mine with a long caress, 
Love seems, with outspread wings, 

O'er us to pause. 



[28] 



ALTAR FIRES 



HIS MOTHER 

I let him go with Youth still in his eyes — 

I let him go 
Where lovely women laugh and men are wise. 
Into the hard old grind I turned his feet 
That life might fit him its demands to meet ; 

I loved him so. 
When he came back I saw the Man-look there- 

And felt no joy. 
To question this tall man I did not dare. 
So, for a breath, we stood a length apart — 
Then, eagerly, I caught him to my heart ; 

He was my Boy ! 



[29] 



ALTAR FIRES 



I TOLD YOU SO 



I told you so ! 
And now, when pain demands its bitter part, 

Why bow your head and take it thus to heart? 
Before your grief I warned you to beware, 

But you — you seemed too confident to care. 
Now why lose faith and let your courage go? 

Remember, long since this, I told you so. 

I told you so ! 
I whispered of the eyes whose subtle gleam 

Filled all your life and made home perfect seem; 
I spoke of lips too red and full to crave 

For one man's kiss. Such beauty could not save 
Its charm for you — too brilliant was its glow. 

Why did you not beUeve ? I told you so ! 

I told you so ! 
My friendship for you prompted me to see 

Her restless life which made its strange decree 
Of secret joy. You looked so calmly on, 

So good, so sure, the all-forgiving one, 
My words sprang forth in all their bitter flow: 

So blame ME if you must, I told you so. 

I told you so ! 
But now, since she has gone and left you free. 
With swift belief you turn anon to me, 

[30] 



ALTAR FIRES 

So broken and so pale beneath your smile 
My heart turns cold, in just this little while 

You feel the truth and rally from the blow. 
I would have saved you this — I told you so. 

I told you so ! 
And in your pain you look to me and ask 

The way to turn, and such a grievous task 
Must fall on one who knows, thro' love of you. 

Just how to tell the false part and the true. 
And in the years to come much joy you'll know- 

I love you — tho' I should not tell you so. 



[31] 



ALTAR FIRES 



UNRECONCILED 



Speak not of yesterday, the buried past 
Must ever quiet lie, and still and cold; 
The tears I shed, the longings and regret. 

Seemed far too bitter and too sharp to last. 
Such poignant grief must loose its iron hold; 

I cannot smile — since I cannot forget. 

Speak not of yesterday, its gloom and chill 
Creep o'er my life and snatch away my sun. 

I struggle to be brave — hope must not die, — 
But memories of the past their claims instill; 

Its loving, radiant day had but begun ! 

And on its grave my youth and courage lie. 



132J 



ALTAR FIRES 



MY ROSE 



My Rose, sweet Rose. 
Gracefully tripping away she goes, 
Light is her laughter, but lighter her toes ; 
Sweet and inviting the glance that she throws 
Over her shoulder at me, dear Rose — 

Dear Rose ! 

My Rose, shy Rose. 
Fain would I to you my love propose, 
Only your saucy smile too plainly shows 
How such a love would be brought to a close- 
Deep tho' its passion and faithful, my Rose, 

My Rose ! 

But Rose, Oh, Rose, 
When soft around you the moonlight flows 
And in your heart its serenity throws. 
Think then of me as a love-token blows 
From unseen lips to you, my Rose — 

My Rose! 



[33] 



. ALTAR FIRES 



THE TRAITOR 

Cupid came to me in the long ago 

And asked me to play in the game of love. 
He seemed such a wee little sprite, you know, 

That I could not refuse him and let him go. 
So I joined in the game my own skill to prove. 

We began with laughter and jests and fun, 
And we matched our wits with keen delight. 

We stopped not to reckon who lost and who won ; 
In the barter of heart-throbs the truth we could shun 

While we waged such a glorious fight. 

But I soon caught the power of the challenge he sent 

And my soul was the stake in this Love-game of 
chance. 
Every parry and thrust in our tournament 
Stirred my blood to fire, for I knew he rent 
With a master hand in each slow advance. 

So I cautioned Cupid to play me fair, 
But he smiled with eyes that knew Love's game thro' 

To the bitter end and he did not care 
Now the game was won, so he left me there 

And was off for another maid to woo. 

On my knees I begged for the soul I'd lost ; 
Every other trophy he well might hold, — 



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But his young eyes laughed : I could count the cost 

Thro' the years to come. Then to me he tossed 
Just an empty heart — and the tale was told. 

Oft since he has passed with his arching bow, 
But beyond the reach of my longing cry. 

Still I feel the sting of his arrows go 
To the smarting wound of the long ago, — 

And I bow my head till he passes by. 



[35] 



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PHANTOMS 



I do not know just what it could have been 
That spoke of you out of the dormant past — 

A strain of music, perhaps, — a breath of flowers 

That brought you back with all the hallowed hours. 

And storming o'er the present came at last 
The old, old longing for your touch again. 

O, I can smile and meet each budding day 
With courage to go through until the night; 

While those around me, in their happiness. 

Make darker, far, the way in my distress. 

But when the shadows come, it is my right 
To seek the solitude — to grieve — and pray. 

And know you, where you are, each hour is rife 
With memories of you while there is life. 
And when death comes — But no. See, I can smile 
And sing and dance . . But wanting you the while ! 



[36] 



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THE CROSS 



'T is better so, perhaps, 't is better so, 

That I should bear this cross while I am young. 
To learn to look into men's eyes and know 

The tragedy that lies behind their smile. 
Yet must I feel that every song that's sung 

Has tears behind its sweetness all the while? 

Like Saint Helena, bearing up her cross 
So patiently, maybe I, too, shall know 

The beauty of unburdening the dross 
Of life's late offering in this, my youth, 

And have, from out the pain, rich blessings grow. 
And know through years to come the eye of truth. 

And so, 't is better, perhaps, my cross to bear 
While I am young — but happy were the years 

When laughing lips ne'er offered up a prayer. 
And laughing eyes knew not the smart of tears. 



[37] 



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MY BIRTHDAY 

My birthday! Time, go back a little space! 

Must all the pretty toys of yesterday 
Be sadly stored within the sacred place 

Where all the dreams of happy childhood play? 

The dear old dolls of cloth and wax and wood 
Accuse the hands that drop them, one by one, 

Within the casket of my babyhood. 

The lid must close before the coming sun 

Of that maturity that does this day 

Forbid the frolics of the long ago. 
Or was it long ago? Or just a way 

Adown the hours a little while or so? 



[38] 



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OUR BOYS 



They put on pride with their uniforms, 

They took up grit with their guns ; 
From the calm of peace in the homeland, 

To the throb of war with the Huns. 
From the light and warmth of their favorite club. 

To the line of the rank and file; 
From the kiss of love with a trembling lip. 

To the kiss of death — with a smile. 

They took their youth as a bond to give 

In reply to their country's call ; 
The shine of their names will forever live. 

To be honored and loved by all. 
Those who came back to heart and home 

We know will understand 
The grief and love for those who sleep 

Within a foreign land. 



[39] 



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HER PASSPORT 



It was so strange a thing that she could smile : 
So many griefs were tugging at her heart 

And begging for a place. Each little while 
She cautioned them in whispers to depart, 

Lest lips and eyes should falter at their task 
And fail to do their bidding at the last. 

But even in the whispering, her voice 

Lost nothing of its cheerful, sweet control. 

She would not lay down arms. It was her choice 
They had left empty chambers in her soul. 

Since she had set him free to go his way 
Why linger in a stormy yesterday? 

So wonderful a thing her smile could be — 
With tears behind its glory. Like the sun 

Caught laughing o'er the troubled waves at sea. 
O, she had loved him fondly ! That was done 

And blotted with the past. Alone was she. 
But where she went the world gave her a place 

Because she wore a smile upon her face. 



[40] 



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HE KISSED HER HANDS 

He kissed her hands ! 
There, in the dim-ht hall, where other men 

Had kissed her lips, 
He paused as if to say a last good-night, 

So boyish and sincere. 
Before she knew quite his intent, she felt 
The pressure of his fingers round her own 
And then 

He kissed her hands. 

She'd had no thought of him before but in 

A casual way. 
His voice, perhaps, was softer than the rest, 
His smile 

A bit more sweet. 
But never after he had gone away 
Did aught within her being cry for him. 
She just forgot until, perchance, he came — 

All but that night 

He kissed her hands. 



But when the little silence fluttered down 

Between them as they stood, 
And she looked up to find his eyes on hers- 
She caught her breath 

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To find her heart was really beating so. 

And when he bent 
That sleek, young head of his above her hands 
And his warm lips touched softly on her palms- 
Another feeling, sweetly new, awoke 
To sway her with the passion of its call. 
She felt she loved him when 
He kissed her hands. 



[42] 



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LONG BEACH 

A stretch of sandy beach lies smooth 
Beneath the darkening, evening sky. 

A growing moon peeps through the clouds 
And shrouds itself in mystery. 

The night-birds cry along the shore, 

The giant waves roll slowly in 
And break with hissing, whitening spray, 

Receding noisily again. 

The sombre clouds, grey-flecked and chill, 
Drift toward the moon and catch its light 

To throw the pallid, ghostly gleam 
Across the darkness of the night. 

As here upon the beach we stand 

And dream our dreams 'neath nature's spell, 
No warning comes to tell our hearts 

That we are saying our farewell. 

But let the ocean sing its song — 
In years to come we shall forget 

We ever stood and listened here 
To all its sighings of regret. 



[43] 



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WITHOUT YOU 



So glorious the days — yet sad my heart. 

I call your name and echos mock my cry. 
I cannot think of you from home apart — 

The little home we worked for, you and I. 

It was so short a time to take from life 

Full measure of its joy. We could not hear 

In happiness like ours the threat of strife; 
Nor could we feel the parting that was near. 

For had we known it, every little thing 

Would have been treasured since it was the last; 

Each smile, each word — so worth remembering. 
Each kiss a sacrament for kisses past. 

Now morning dawns without you. All the day 
I want you so in each remembered place. 

I work the lonely, dragging hours away 
With constant longing just to see your face. 

When twilight comes — its shadows deep and black 
Without your voice to help me find the light — 

O, dearest, dearest, would you but come back 
To hold me close and kiss me once good-night ! 



[44] 



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ADRIFT 



I went away from home without a heart. 

The heart of me was torn in Httle bits 
And buried in the graves of those I loved. 

And so I wandered from the fold alone 
And looked at men with speculative eyes. 

No wealth of purse was mine to arm my soul 
With lovely hopes against the want of love. 

No kindred put their tenderness on me 

Like holy drops. Yet deep within my eyes 

There burned the beacon for a human love. 



And as I wandered out into the world, 

Men turned and looked with warmest of 
sympathy, 

While women, love-wrapped, hurried on their way 
And left me starved — I, who had always known 

The solace of affection and a home. 



So, as I gazed ahead toward life's gray road, 
The flood-gates opened over my restraint; 

Men, seeing, looked at once with keener zest 
Than warmth of sympathy within their glance. 

Their look had all the eager call for mate. 

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And elemental urge of youth and sex 

Made me return their glance, but barring still 

The yield of all that pride and birth had taught. 
But lonely is the way, and dark — and long . . . 

I hesitate — with speculative eyes. 



[46] 



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SO DEAR HE IS 



Father in heaven, so dear he is to me, 

So very dear! 
Helpless am I to lead him unto Thee, 
Laggard his feet in path of right would be; 
Speak in his heart through nature's minstrelsy ; 

Make him sincere! 

Father of all, stretch out Thy rod of love 

Over his head. 
Teach him Thy way — its beauty to him prove. 
Life's petty sins set Thou his thoughts above, 
Judgment suspend — Thy blessing from me move 

To him instead. 

Weak is Thy child temptation to defy; 

Help him to go 
Over rough ways when danger lurks near-by. 
If we be judged by weakness there on high, 
Give me his cross — for weaker far am I, 

Loving him so! 



[47] 



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THE DEBUTANTE 

The pale wine bubbles in the glass 

Like amber shot with fire ; 
So clink with me and drink with me 

To what we most desire. 
May all the gifts be yours, my lass, 

Of all the gods above, 
For I'm in love with you, — alas ! 

But you're in love with Love. 

The wine of hope is all astir 

Within my veins to-night. 
So smile with me and wile with me 

The hours that yet are bright. 
By every cross I bear for you 

Devotion will I prove : 
Oh, I'll love you my whole life through- 

Though you're in love with Love. 

Your lips are sweeter than the wine, 

Your eyes are far more bright : 
But for one kiss I'd give the bliss 

Of countless years to-night. 
The soul of me through love of you 

Is close to God above. 
Child, to your innocence be true 

While you're in love with Love! 

[48] 



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NIGHT 

It creeps upon us unaware, 

Mysterious with sleep : 
We feel its potency of rest 

As trees soft good night speak. 
Each firefly lights its little torch 

And on its mission goes, 
To see that every flower's head 

Is bent in sweet repose. 

A drowsy dark enfolds us close; 

The ocean's distant roar 
Is singing strange, wild luUabys 

Unto the wave-washed shore. 
We lay aside the fret of day — 

Our troubles we dismiss; 
And sleep drops down on silent wings 

To bless us with her kiss. 



[49] 



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THE OPTIMIST 

Laugh with me, quaff with me, make merry chaff with 
me, 

Fill up your glasses and raise them with mine. 
Drink to the nearest one, aye, and the dearest one, 

I give you Pleasure, and pledge it with wine. 

Think not of sorrow, nor yet of to-morrow. 
Bask in the sun of the Present's bright smile ; 

Woes will come, foes will come, what, no one knows 
will come, 
Laugh while you may and make merry the while. 

What is ahead of us, who will instead of us 
Revel to-morrow, light-hearted and free? 

Warm life is calling us, beauty enthralling us. 
Now is the time, lads, for you and for me. 

We've time without measure, let's give it to pleasure ; 

My secret's are yours and your secrets are mine ; 
Up with your glasses, lads, drink to the lasses, lads, 

I give you Love, and I pledge it with wine. 



[50] 



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THE HOME-LAND 

Skies are sunny clear above me, 
Birds are merry in their lay, 

Tender hearts are near to love me 

On the rough, uncertain way; 

But the path is long and dreary 
For my laggard feet to roam ; 

Of the garish day I'm weary — 
Father, Father, take me home. 

I can hear the ceaseless laughter 

Of the world so gay and light; 
Pleasure — with no grim hereafter, 

Day — without an endless night; 
And the babble of the living 

Mocks those in their silent tomb; 
While my heart is yet forgiving. 

Father, Father, take me home. 

Lips are selfish of their kisses 

If I hunger for their touch; 
Loving words my sad heart misses 

If I want them over-much; 
Like a child grown tired of playing, 

For Thy solace overcome. 
Lest my feet from Thee be straying. 

Father, Father, take me home. 

[SI] 



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THE LOST NOTE 

I listened to the thrilling of a flute 

Mid cornet's notes and trombone's solemn bass; 
The shrilling fifes led on the dancing race 
Of skipping measure as I listened, mute. 
I heard the drums — their constant rumble wrote 

Upon my heart a vague and dull unrest; 
For in the crash of blended music's zest 

I felt in some vague way, a missing note. 
The passion of its call was gay and flaunting, 

Behind the grandest chords I felt the strain 
Of sympathy suspended, like the wanting 

Of that low cry that warns the heart of pain. 
As in a boyish choir one hears the sweetness 

But sung as children sing — above the heart; 
It's tuneful, like the birds, but so apart 

From human love, that goes to make completeness. 

I looked into your eyes, your eyes of brightness, 
I sought your soul — but in your steadfast gaze 

I caught but admiration and the praise 

Of witty lips, that injured by their lightness. 

I touched your hand, your quiet fingers proving 
A swift response unto my mute appeal; 

And yet I wondered if you, too, could feel 

The broken bond, — the missing note of loving. 

[52] 



ALTAR FIRES 

But now the music's crash dies down to quiet, 

And one low strain from vioHn comes streaming 
In sobbing breath with love and pity gleaming, 

And all my youth's swift blood is running riot. 
You bend your head — I feel your warm breath near, 

The violin sings on in saddened sweetness; 
And with the music's passionate completeness 

Your lips touch mine, — the missing note is here. 



[S3] 



ALTAR FIRES 



UNBLESSED 



Oh, God, here on my knees, I pray to Thee! 

My heart is sore beset, my empty hands 
Are reaching heavenward in their earnest plea. 

In that rare power of Thine that understands 
The fret and worry of the long, dark way, 

Forgive Thy child an erring yesterday. 

But point the way. Oh, Father, and my feet 
Will blindly go — and leave the rest to Thee. 

My starving soul within is incomplete 
Without Thy blessing, long denied to me. 

A stranger oft to prayer, dear God above, 
Make me to-morrow holy by Thy love! 



[54] 



ALTAR FIRES 



BROKEN FRIENDSHIP 

Last night! and yet it seems so long ago 

I wonder if I ever called you friend, 
And shared with you life's pleasures and life's woe. 

Our friendship was so deep, so kind, so true — 
In light or shade I always turned to you 

And found relief and comfort in your smile: 
And yet, in just this bitter little while 

Distrust and doubt our faith and love transcend. 

Why could we not o'erlook the few defects 

Which nature gives, nor spares their glaring shame? 

A friend who's true another's faults ejects. 

Our confidence exchanged was far from wise, 
For failings grow when brought before the eyes 

And bear ill fruits for both one's self and friend ; 
A man will e'er his own mistakes defend. 

And in that same defence will blindly flame. 

The rose is fair, as was our trust's belief; 

But if that perfect flower we rudely rend 

Because we see a stain upon its leaf, 

Where is the flower we erstwhile called so fair? 
Scattered and dead, in all its beauty rare: 

And thus it is with too exacting friends ; 
Regret for what is done ne'er makes amends — 

A friend can't stand in judgment o'er a friend. 

[55] 



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Far better were it if this after part 

Were pain and storm and tears as follow love, 
And not this dull unrest within the heart. 

One little explanation left unsaid, 
And yet we stood there stern and mute instead. 

I would I'd never shared your friendship's trust 
And learned its worth to see it burn to dust. 

Misunderstood in what it failed to prove. 



[56] 



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I NEED THEE 



Take Thou my hand, my Father, take my hand, 
Lead me away in safer paths to tread; 

Danger is here, in subtle beauty flowing, 
Warmly alive, with all enticements glowing; 

Teach me belief in all that Thou hast said, 
Help me Thy ways of right to understand. 

I am alone and longing for Thy blessing, 
Make me to feel all confidence in prayer; 

Life is not sweet with savor in the living, 
Loving or loved, forgiven or forgiving. 

In every joy I feel a want is there — 
Is that want Thou, and is the joy confessing? 



[57] 



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OUR GAME 



We are playing a game of loving, 

How long is the game to last? 
We have matched our skill and had our fill, 

And the charm of the sport is past ; 
Is there aught that's amiss in the pastime, 

Now the gamut of pleasure is run? 
Was either one playing in earnest, 

Or were both of us playing for fun? 

Do you wish the game forgotten. 

With the lilt of its laughter and fears? 
Let us give and take — just for friendship's sake, 

A kiss, to forget the tears. 
And let us return the tokens. 

You say it is easily done; 
Ah, but one was contending in earnest, 

Tho' the other was playing for fun. 

You ask if the game is over — 

Why, to me it was but begun; 
I thought that you would be sorry, too, 

Tho' the sport was just for fun. 
All we cared was to fill the moments. 

But we've wasted the whole day long: 
Had we known one was playing in earnest. 

Would the game have been free from wrong? 

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ALTAR FIRES 

We are both of us mute at parting, — 

It is hard to say good-by. 
As you take my hand, do you understand 

Which is victor, you or I? 
But your lips have been schooled to laughter. 

No matter how luck did run : 
But which played the love-game in earnest. 

And which of us played it for fun? 



[59] 



ALTAR FIRES 



WHEN I WAS A CHILD 

When I was a child I thought the Hps 

Were made but to smile in life's happy sun : 
And laid them by in my youthful bliss : 
And I counted my blessings, every one, 
I knew not, I knew not that lips could kiss 

Till the passion and gladness of life were gone- 
When I was a child. 

When I was a child I thought the eyes 

Were to see the world in its splendid years 

Of arrogant bud that lifts and cheers 
Every soul to wish to be good and kind. 

I knew not, I knew not eyes could go blind 

With the sting of pain and the smart of tears — 
When I was a child. 

When I was a child I thought my heart 
Was for praising God in His home above; 

I bent the knee every night to prove 

That my soul rejoiced in its youthful trust ; 

I knew not, I knew not that woman must 

Heed the call of a heart in its first great love — 
When I was a child. 



[60] 



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A PRAYER 

Dear God, at night I do not kneel 

Beside my bed to pray — 
I ask not that Thy blessing rest 

Upon me thro' the day. 
I make no claim upon Thy grace 

That it may shelter me — 
And yet when earthly comforts fail, 

I always turn to Thee. 

The church that's sacred to Thy word — 

I am a stranger there ; 
Tho 'all Thy handiwork I love, 

I voice it not in prayer. 
But let life's troubles come to me. 

No matter how or when. 
My soul cries out alone to Theej 

I feel I need Thee then. 

I know no framing for the words 

My heart cries out to say, 
For all my life Thy heavenly grace 

Has seemed so far away. 
But wilt Thou hear the stranger voice 

That bares my soul to Thee? 
And wilt Thou send from out Thy heart 

A gift of love for me? 
[6i] 



ALTAR FIRES 

My petty griefs I've borne alone, 

Nor to Thee dared to bring ; 
But in my keener anguish, Lord, 

Unto Thy cross I cling. 
And may its sacred arms uplift 

My erring soul to Thee, 
Transformed in blessed purity 

Throughout eternity. 



[62] 



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VIRGINIA 



Virgin in soul and white in mind, 

Child of the God of all mankind, 
May your sacred lips and your baby eyes 

Teach my weary heart where grief's solace lies. 

Worry and care with their haunting cry 
In my tired brain as each day goes by 

Turn to joy and peace as I watch you play, 
And your happy laugh steals the heart away. 

Oh, I pray thro' my boundless love for you 
That the God above will keep you true 

To the call of life that knows no pain 

In the harvest's sweep of the year's rich gain. 

And God's sacrament in your gentle touch 
On my life that is restless over-much, 

Makes me cry to Him to keep you good 

In the beautiful strength of your babyhood. 



[63] 



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THE SUMMER GIRL 

She is only a summer girl, I thought, 
As I called her fair and pressed her hand; 

Too pretty and young to understand 

All the pain of life — love is yet untaught; 

Sweet and content and as flawless as pearl — 
Just a gay little, stray little summer girl. 

We walked by the sea when the moon was bright 
While the night was warm and the winds were still ; 

And I felt in my veins a tender thrill 
So I took her hand with a lover's right. 

But the scorn of her mirth with impetuous whirl 
Made me laugh at and chaff at the summer girl. 

In the sunshine where gold in her hair I could trace 
She would stand by my side in her fresh, laughing 
youth ; 
And the heart in me hungered to tell her the truth. 
As I held her dear hands and looked down on her 
face. 
But she, with a smile and a toss of a curl 
Was a shy little, spry little summer girl. 

But there came a time when the cold winds blew, 

And summer was going — alas ! too soon ; 
I had learned to love zephyrs and gentle moon — 

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ALTAR FIRES 

I had found many things fair and sweet that I knew. 
I had learned to love, with her beauty and twirl 
My coy little, toy little summer girl. 

I told her I'd miss her and begged her to say 
We need never part in the long years to come : 

But with lips on my Hps yet she bade me to roam 
And leave it to chance if we crossed in our way. 

And I know — now I know that hope did not unfurl 
In my queer little, dear little summer girl. 

Years passed. One day in a city street 
A dreary procession passed solemnly by; 

I sorrowed for those who were sad, nor knew why. 
But I followed the mourners with slow, aimless feet. 

As I gazed through the throng toward the altar's 
bright gleam, 
The face of my summer girl rose like a dream. 

And ere the sweet vision could pass from my mind 
I found myself gazing upon her — once gay, 

Now white and so still in her casket she lay. 
And others were sobbing whom she'd left behind. 

Mid the turbulent sorrow of life's dreary whirl 
God had given his peace to my dead summer girl. 



[65] 



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LOOK DOWN INTO MY EYES 

Look down into my eyes to-night — deep down, 
So that my soul to your dear soul shall speak. 

Let but this silent message pass between 

Ere lips from lips the parting kiss must seek. 

This is no time, my own, to grieve and cry 
That fate has cheated us of our just due; 

It is enough that I can hold your hand 
Before you go away — and comfort you. 

For parting-time is older than the sun; 

And lover's grief is part of life's great plan. 
So smile, my love, and tell me we have won. 

Look long into my eyes — and be a man! 



[66] 



ALTAR FIRES 



NIGHT WHISPERS 

The night is warm — she feels the fragrant air 

And draws a breath that thrills deep thro' her veins, 

So full it is of all of life that's fair; 
And all the depth her woman's soul contains 

Breathes out its glow in soft, sweet cadence there. 

Her heart is free as is the gentle wind 

That murmurs in the tree-tops o'er her head; 

Relentless fate is often over-kind — 

And to her ne'er a warning word has said 

That love full-blown means love to-morrow dead. 



[67] 



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EARTH-BOUND 

Oh, my Father, do Thou spare Thy child 

Yet a Httle while to live the day 
To the evening's close. The morning wild 

Full of youth's vain dreams has passed away; 
And the noon, in all its lurid glow, 

Taught its bitter lessons long ago. 
Standing here, upon the brink of eve, 

Let me live to trust Thee — and believe. 

Let me live to place upon Thy throne 

That bright star of love Thy children give — 
For I wandered from the fold alone. 

Till I find the Homeland, let me live! 
Father, I am now so near the night. 

Give me strength to battle for the right : 
Let my tired feet no longer roam — 

Father, bless me, ere Thou call me Home. 



[68] 



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I SHALL NOT PASS THIS WAY AGAIN 

Let the wine be red, let the wine be old, 

I shall not pass this way again; 
Youth's but a day when all is told. 
Old age is long and slow and cold; 
Now my blood is warm and my step is bold, 
So my glass of wine to the lees I'll drain, — 
For I shall not pass this way again. 

Let your eyes meet mine with a glance that's kind, 

I shall not pass this way again ; 
And all of the years I leave behind 
I shall count as lost if they did not bind 
Both our lives with a joy that is hard to find, 
Joy made secure by Love's golden chain; 
For I shall not pass this way again. 

Let your song be light, let your song be gay, 

I shall not pass this way again ; 
Sing the cares and the heartaches all away. 
Let us live in the NOW, not the yesterday, 
For to-morrow's dawn may be chill and gray. 
Give me measure of love for each measure of pain,- 
For I shall not pass this way again. 



[69] 



ALTAR FIRES 



THE YOUNG WIFE 

Dear little girl with the sad young eyes, 

Why grieve in your youth that an idol raised 

On your girlhood pedestal shattered lies, 

By your woman's wit justly now appraised? 

An idol can love and then hasten away — 

But the love of a husband lasts more than a day. 

Did you think the lover would last for aye, 
With the soft caress in his ardent eyes? 

Has the husband now laid the cloak away, 
And shown you the man in a different guise? 

He is young and sincere. O, I pray, let him be ! 
Don't encourage deceit and a feigned gallantry. 

Maybe, who knows, in his big, boyish heart. 
He misses the playmate of love-making days ! 

The solemn young wife is of mystery part. 

With her great wistful eyes and her strange little 
ways. 

He's been petted, like you, by a mother's fond smile : 

Take him just as he is and be patient awhile. 

Little girl, little wife, while it's Spring in your life. 
Be content with the BOY, for he loves you in truth. 

There is time, ample time, when a measure of strife 
Will bring tenderness forth — at the cost of his 
youth. 

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But life teaches these lessons thro' heartaches and 
tears ; 
Learn to laugh in the Spring ere Life's Winter ap- 
pears . 

Time will come, little girl, when grave sorrows will 

trace 

Troubled lines round his mouth and his cheerful 

blue eyes : 

And the look of the MAN in your husband's dear face 

Will arise o'er the grave where his dead boyhood 

lies. 
In the heart of the woman God gave him to hold ! 



[71] 



ALTAR FIRES 



CONTRARINESS 

My eyes admire all beauteous things in life 
Without reserve or stint of spoken praise ; 

My courage shuns no battle or no strife 
When you stand not at parting of the ways. 

But with you near my eyes grow selfish, shy 
Of admiration voiced — so weak am I. 

I often bend and touch the silver stream 
With eager lips to feel its cool repose; 

Among fair blooms I sit full oft and dream 
With cheek close pressed to clematis or rose ; 

But your dear mouth, with all its power to sway, 
I fear to kiss — and give my heart away. 

I love the sunshine with its happy gleams 

Of glad, warm gold o'erspreading earth and sky ; 

I love the moonlight with its softer dreams 
That fold me round with holy mystery; 

My heart to you alone of all the rest 
Withholds confession — and I love you best. 



[72] 



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TWO LOVES 

You and I — just you and I ; 

Love like ours ne'er reasons why, 
While youth's sunshine drowns the cry 

Of death and pain and misery. 

You or I — which, you or I? 

It is time that one must try 
To fling aside the sullied tie 

That makes our love a mockery. 

You, not I — 't is you, not I 

Who laughs to scorn the woman's cry 
For love uplifted, lest it die 

And breaks her heart in her good-bye. 



[73] 



ALTAR FIRES 



TO 



Dearie, dearie, life has grown so cold, 
So empty for the constant want of you : 

Lonely hours and haggard days and old — 

My heart, across death's claim, to you is true, 

It reaches out for all you meant to me 
In love's short hour of life's eternity. 

Dearie, dearie, can you ever know. 

All the pain, the mockery of life, 
Since you went away, so long ago? 

All the battle with myself, the strife 
To feel God knew 't were best for you and me 

To call you first in death's grim tragedy? 

Life around me, every little place. 

Breathes of you and holds me with your power; 
Haunted, dreamlike, by your voice, your face. 

Death I fear not, since I feel your right 
To guide me through the darkness to the light. 



[74] 



ALTAR FIRES 



FORSAKE HIM NOT 

He is Thy child, O, God, — Thy child to-day 

As in the years long gone when Thou didst breathe 
Thy hallowed life within his baby frame, 

And give him power to live and power to pray — 
And power to suffer, too, and power to grieve 

In days to come, as now. So, since his heart 
Is hardened by the stab of Fortune's hand, 

Into his soul Thy peace and love impart. 
Guide Thou his thoughts — and make him understand. 

Bitter he stands on life's uncertain way — 
God of my fathers, teach him how to pray ! 



[75] 



ALTAR FIRES 



THRU THE RAIN 



I love you so, I love you so to-night ! 

The steady rain is slashing on the pane — 
The winds, let loose, are howling in their might; 

I am alone — and wanting you again. 

The glitter of these luxuries of mine 

Offend my eyes since you have gone away : 

The little wooded spot I've made my shrine 
Where you and I declared our love one day. 

Why was I not content with love and you? 

Why did I reach for what my heart denied? 
Life offers nothing — nothing that is true 

Your arms dear fold, your tender kiss beside. 

I want the fleck of moonlight on the sea — 
I want your lips — your eyes' impassioned light. 

Beloved, thru the rain, come back to me, 
I love you so — and want you so to-night! 



[76] 



ALTAR FIRES 



MY HEART IS LIKE A HARP 

My heart is like a golden harp attuned 

And waiting for your hand to sweep its strings 

To wake the wild, glad music of its love. 
Arion's lyric song, Apollo's lyre 

Could bring forth strains with less of magic fraught 
Than could your fingers, sweeping o'er the chord 

Of love's desires half sleeping, unfulfilled. 

My heart is like a harp, and in its keep 
There slumbers passion, sympathy and grief, 

With love's eternal constancy of joy. 

So when your fingers, love-tipped, touch its strings, 

The soul of music will give forth its song 
And kiss the lips of harmony — and you. 



l77] 



ALTAR FIRES 



GIVE ME THE WEST 

Give me the West with the lurid glow 

Of flagrant sun and the restful blow 
Of sweeping grass o'er the boundless fields 

Where good mother earth such rich harvest yields. 

Give me the West where the broncos dance 
To the cut of a spur in a bold advance, 

And the gUmmer of steel in a practiced hand 
Makes man bow to a law he can understand. 

Give me the West where the heart is light 

As the silver stars in an azure night ; 
And the soul is as free as the birds that fly — 

What a place to live! What a place to die! 



[78] 



ALTAR FIRES 



THE CALL OF YOU 

The red of my lips and the shine of my eyes 

Are just for you. 
The depth of my soul where love's secret lies 

Is just for you. 
The beat of my heart and its passion's flame 
Are aroused by your lips as you speak my name, 
For no other call can be just the same 

As the call of you. 



[79] 



ALTAR FIRES 



GIVE ME THE GLASS 

Give me the glass till I fill it with laughter 

Deeply imprisoned in amber-hued wine; 
Fling off the cloak of gloom! Let the hereafter 

Look to itself, for the present is mine. 
Mine are the hours of this night's happy musing — 

Mine to be gay with the youth that is mine ; 
Each of our lives is of each of our choosing — 

Give me the glass till I fill it with wine ! 



[80] 



ALTAR FIRES 



FORGET YOU, DEAR? 

Forget you, dear? Well, yes, when sky and sea 

Forget to meet and kiss before the day; 
When life is woe and death is happiness. 

When every vital part of me is still 
And lies there, unresponsive, *neath your kiss. 

Then, should you go from out my heart's recess, 
I should forget to grieve with you away, 

As if the world had given a boon to me 
In leaving me alone. And only this 

Can soothe the pain — when there's your place to fill. 



[8i] 



ALTAR FIRES 



HER REWARD 



All day she went about her drugging work; 

No smile was on her lips tho' baby hands 
Were fretting at her skirts and asking alms 

Of pats and kisses which she could not shirk. 
She did not sing — the clatter of the pans 

Too jarring was to blend with music's charms. 

So toiled she in the heat. And all day long 

Within her heart, grown numb with too much pain, 

She loved the man who married for a home. 
Romance forgotten was — 'Twas she alone 

Who sought its thrill to woo back youth again; 
The man ne'er made a move to right the wrong. 

At night he came to taste the luscious meal 

Her worn hands had prepared, and round him shied 

The sweet, clean children, lending home their peace. 
But ate he hungrily, with scarce a word: 

And opposite, his wife's low voice he heard 

But dimly, for his thoughts had sought release 

In pipe and paper. And the woman sighed. 

She watched him later on their flower-decked porch 
Absorbed in thought — and so she stole away 

To put the babes to bed. Then by the light 
She took the mending and with tired eyes 

[82] 



ALTAR FIRES 

Spied out the holes, as one who vainly tried 
To fill a gap that e'er yawned empty quite. 

One word would be enough — one little word 
Of praise for tasty food or dainty cloth; 

Some hold to cling to underneath the froth 
That life has offered her these weary years. 

Such dull routine found no relief in tears — 
Joy seemed now at an end — not just deferred. 

And all she asked of life was one short hour 
At twilight's glow to sit beside the man 

Her heart had chosen in youth's first sweet call : 
To hear his voice give gratefully its dower 

Of worthy praise for work that left her wan. 
To hear him say 'T love you!" — that was all. 



[83] 



ALTAR FIRES 



DOUBTS 

So much I've bourne. God willed that I should meet 
The thorns of life before I plucked the rose. 

Rough was the way where trod my baby feet, 

Stern the demands my youth's first strength to greet. 

Oh, since I've struggled for the night's repose, 
Let it come now — before I face defeat ! 

So much I've hoped. When darkest shadows lay 

Over my path and shut away my sun, 
I've tried to smile, e'en thru my tears, and pray 

Grieving, their balm would drive the hurt away; 
Trusting that battles lost, instead of won, 

Would, at the last, a blessing for me say. 

And I have wept. Is there, in that white pain 
Aught of a joy surrendered, unfulfilled? 

Is there a peace beyond this world to gain 
After the heart has ceased its fitful strain? 

What is the price, when passion's fires are stilled 
That we can hope for, that our 30uls can claim? 

So much I've prayed. So hard has been the blight 
Of every wish that crashed to earth. Alone, 

Groping my way, I've tried to see the light 

In that dim future which we claim as right — 

We who have fought and lost — instead of won. 

[84] 



ALTAR FIRES 



THE PRICE 



I never dreamed I could be so alone 

And feel your presence near. War's toss of dice 
Has taken toll of each and every one — 

And you, dear one, have paid your bitter price. 

It would be better far had you gone blind 
Than left to wander, groping out your way 

With seeing eyes, yet lost to home and kind; 
Your mind deaf to my call — to what I say. 

I cannot bear to have you look at me 

With those dear eyes that cannot sense my smile; 
To have you here within my arms, to be 

Yet muttering of other things the while. 

If you've forgotten home and me, and years 

Bring nothing back, — may God then set you free. 

Better by far on your dead face my tears, 
Than have you live and not remember me ! 



.8S1 



ALTAR FIRES 



THE TEST OF SACRIFICE 

You stand beside me now, my love — my love ! 

So silent, tho' it is our parting-time, 
When proof of every vow should beg for speech. 

Fm waiting here within your arms' slow reach. 
Why do you pause before that kiss sublime? 

That last, long kiss that shall our union prove. 

What I have given to you I can't regret. 

For love like mine no sacrifice is great 
Before the storm- tossed sea of your desire. 

Yet something holy stays mid passion's fire, 
To chasten and subdue me as I wait 

To hear you say you never can forget. 

You stand so silent now. Our souls are bare 
Before each other's eyes — and you must go 

And leave me here to pay a woman's price, 
The debt life claims for loving sacrifice; 

The shackles of a bondage man can't know. 
And woman meets it smiling — tho' unfair. 

Why stand you so? Is there no word to say 
Of all the things we dreamed of, you and I? 

No vow to make? No promises to prove 

Your whispered words to me thro' nights of love? 

And is this parting-time a real good-bye? 

God bless you, then — and speed you on your way! 

[86] 



ALTAR FIRES 



SURRENDER 



'Twas when I saw you first. Across the grass 
Your cool gray eyes took up the fire of mine. 
It came to pass 
As miracles oft come on drab day's heels, 

Glowing, sublime. 
The haughty world within my singing heart 

A crumbled mass became before your voice; 
Ambitions, dreams, — the whole creative art 

Of gray-dim years 
Died down before that love. A moment's choice 
From out the joys of life — from out its tears. 



[87] 



ALTAR FIRES 



UNEASY HOURS 

Oh, heart of mine — Oh, woman's heart of mine, 
Why do you crave to leave upon men's Hves 

The flash of you? Be but content to shine 
Unselfishly. The power you have that strives 

To rouse swift passion's flame must die with youth. 
Far better touch with tenderness men's lives — 
Love's lasting truth. 

Your restless moods — so fitfully they sleep 
A touch, a glance, a word will set them free. 

And for the sunset years no store you keep. 

From out this youth's wild madness save for me 

A saner vision when my eyes shall know 
No lure. I want ahead to see 
Where safe to go. 



[88] 



ALTAR FIRES 



FAREWELL 

Over our love and our joy and our pain; 

Farewell. 
You've loved me and kissed me — but never again. 

Farewell. 
The days of our madness and nights of our bliss — 
How little we thought they would bring us to this! 
But I've looked into Heaven with every kiss — 

And Hell. 
Back to the grind and the fret and demand; 

Farewell. 
So we bob up and down as Fate holds out her hand. 

Farewell. 
But we've danced on the way to the scaffold of MUST 
And we've bathed in sincerity, passion and trust, 
As we picked love's best flowers ere all wearied by dust 

They fell. 
And, perhaps, after all such a parting is kind; 

Who can tell ? 
But with sobs I am mute — and with tears I am blind 

At farewell! 



[89] 



ALTAR FIRES 



THEIR FAITH IN ME 

They had such faith in me, my dear ones did : 
IVe stood and watched them going, one by one, 

Into the Land that seems so far away. 

I've Hngered by them, helpless, while they slid 

Gently away — forever to be gone — 

And all my yearning could not make them stay. 

Their faith in me was such a blessed thing! 

To think I should fall short in that last hour 
And stand by, tortured, while they looked to me 

To use the knowledge born of love to bring 
Their ebbing life-tide back to all its power. 

Oh, why was not God's wisdom given to me 
To meet that trust within those dying eyes 

And ease them sweetly down in their last sleep ? 
I, too, with them have known Gethsemane — 

To hold a loved one close, while death defies 

The warmth my arms would in that dear form keep ! 

So, after all, when that last hour shall come, 
And dear ones stand at parting of the ways — 

A greater Presence has the master hand. 
For with the kiss of death all pain is gone. 

And for the grieving of the one who stays 
The balm of time will make him understand. 

[90] 



ALTAR FIRES 



TO 



You have gone — and I've tasted the wormwood that Ues 

In each cup of our pleasure thru Hfe; 
You have gone— and the sunshine has died from the 
skies 

Like our courage in battle with strife. 
Oh, it's not quite the poor, lonely heart that you leave 

Where the pain is the hardest to bear; 
If you'd not gone away with a smile while I grieve: 

It's the thinking how little you care ! 

You have gone and the tears creep up hot in my eyes ; 

Eyes longing to look on your face. 
You have gone — and the future so desolate lies. 

Where you have no thought and no place. 
I have crushed back my sobs while I waved you 
farewell ; 

I have tried to be brave and be fair. 
But I love you ! I love you ! My lips long to tell. 

You would smile — it's how little you care! 



[91] 



ALTAR FIRES 



YOU GAVE ME VIOLETS 

You gave me violets and now, whene'er their perfume 
steals 
Soft o'er my sense with sweet recall of long- 
forgotten rest, 
I think of one moon-silvered eve, a night for love in 
quest. 
When you and I stood hand in hand and pledged 
love's sacred seals. 
You gave me violets, and in that moon-enchanted hour. 
They nestled close against my heart and breathed 
their scented life 
Upon us like an incense — ah, we knew not then of 
strife — 
But looked upon the future's scroll and trusted to 
its dower. 

We stood content upon the sands, where lapped the 
small, bright waves, 
And deep within your dear, gray eyes I saw the love- 
light glow ; 
I wondered why such perfect joy was given me to know 
When in so many other lives lay green and hungry 
graves. 
I held the blossoms to my face and you, in swift delight, 
Pressed your warm cheek against my own and in 
your man's quick way 

[92] 



ALTAR FIRES 

You drew my soul to meet your lips where love's con- 
fession lay, 
And sanctified that lover's kiss you gave and took 
that night. 

So while the silver water breathed its passion to the 

moon, 
We pledged our troth — a sacred vow that we would 

e'er be true; 
You kissed the drooping little flower that I had given 

to you 
And said our perfect, rosy love would never lose 

its bloom. 
And now, to-night, I think how keen was all that first 

delight ; 
The shadows that around me creep are grim with 

memories dense, 
A contrast to that sunny past with all its love intense, 
As lightning differs from the snow — or wrong is far 

from right. 

There is a mist of tears to-night between the moon 
and me ; 
The future's dower has been but pain that seared an 
empty life ; 
And I, who once had smiled in faith above a world 
of strife, 
Now look with dim and longing eyes across a lonely 
sea. 

[93] 



ALTAR FIRES 

I feel as if the laughing world had closed its fickle 
doors 
And shut within its callous heart all sunshine and 
all love. 
While I, alone, stand cold without beneath the stars 
above 
That must see you, a wanderer, on distant, foreign 
shores. 

Alone I stand upon the shore and in my trembling 
hands 
I clasp a bunch of violets, all sweet with fragrant 
dew; 
Their scented breath recalls the past and makes me 
think of you — 
And how we stood and pledged our vows one eve 
on these same sands. 
Oh, you were full of youth and fire, perhaps you did 
not know 
The lure that lay beyond our love, beyond our lips' 
first kiss. 
And maybe now you've learned it well and know the 
truth of this — 
That men must fight to hold their own wherever 
they may go. 

And women must e'er pay the price in heart-ache and 
in tears! 
Oh, lovely flowers, the scent of you sweeps all the 
years away 

[94] 



ALTAR FIRES 

And makes me feel again your arms and hear your 
deep voice say : 
"I love you, dear. I love you, dear." Ah, how the 
memory sears! 

I hold the violets to my breast and crush them to my 
face — 

The purple blooms, so dewy soft, so full of long ago. 
I wonder if in some far land you'd greet our pledge- 
flower so — 

And would it on your heart, as mine, its stirring 
memory trace. 

But then that other grief steals in and kills the prompt- 
ings sweet; 
That other lesson you have taught and written out 
in pain. 
And in this hour that I had hoped to see joy smile again 
I stand and battle with the life you made me think 
complete ! 
You gave me violets, and now of all the flowers I 
know, 
I shun their fragrance and their bloom so freighted 
with the past. 
Why was it that I did not know such joy could never 
last? 
Why was it, in the first, sweet youth, I learned to 

love you so? 



[95] 



ALTAR FIRES 



MY MOTHER 



Kind she always was. She understood 

All my young life held of dark and light; 
Took she nothing — gave she only good, 

That my youth might blossom without blight. 
Tender was she always. Oft I knew 

As the years rolled by, the sterner way : 
Life's intenser shadows round me drew 

Doubts all new that threatened Hope's bright ray 
Held out by her hand. She felt my pain 

Just as keen as I — thru love of me. 
Loss to her meant joy if 't were my gain; 

Sacrificed she all — and cheerfully. 
In maturer years, when deeper ties 

Welded us together by their woe — 
Grief grown homely, sharper tragedies. 

Reaped unkindly where I did not sow — 
Then that mother-instinct, always true, 

Felt with me the keenness of my pain: 
Idols fallen, ne'er to build anew, 

Castles shattered, reared too soon in Spain. 
Felt with me, yet pointed out the way 

Toward the sunshine and life's saner view. 
Knowing when to kiss and what to say 

That each thought might broaden as it grew. 



196] 



ALTAR FIRES 

When the faith within my heart lay still, 

Stunned by Life's hard lesson driven home, 
And the struggle up the doubt-strewn hill 

Seemed too endless to attempt alone. 
Then I turned to her whose mother-heart 

Felt the turnstile of my woman's soul 
Keener, perhaps, than L And with the art 

Of her blessed wisdom, knew the goal 
Where to point my feet. And in that hour 

When Love came forth to claim me as the price. 
Bravely did she smile and give as dower 

Both her blessing and her sacrifice. 



[97] 



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